I want to take you through my personal process of journaling with the Lord for the fruit of connecting with Him and recieving wisdom and revelation. It’s important to anchor our mediation with God onto something solid like His word. We cannot focus on our problems or emotions. We must center ourselves in God’s word. For this is TRUTH that is unwavering.
Here’s why we do it this way:
“Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.” Matthew 7:24
By grounding ourselves in God’s Truth, we have an opportunity to grow and be a powerful force for His kingdom. Growth comes by walking out the word and bringing God’s word to LIFE with our ACTIONS.
Today’s journal focuses on this verse:
“Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10
As I meditate on God’s word, I begin to pour out my heart to Him. This is what my personal journal says:
“Heavenly Father,
I don’t want to be loyal to my hurt and pain. I don’t want to focus on how others hurt me but I also don’t want to be used like a doormat and be disrespected as this does not help me with my confidence and self-worth issues.
I’m trying to navigate how to engage hurtful people with genuine forgiveness and God-given wisdom. Holy Spirit, please guide my words and actions. Today, I lay down my deep roots of bitterness, rejection and self protection. I ask for a renewal of my heart for you to show me the Holy Spirit’s perspective. “
As I pour out my heart, I begin to see a vision! I asked for the Holy Spirit’s perspective and He answered right away! I see I am wearing a white gauze robe, that looks like the gauze used to dress a wound. It has puss, blood and skin chunks on it. My mind recoils at the scent of decay. I begin to write:
“Today I give you these terrible, putrid, stinking garments of unforgiveness, resentment, bitterness, rejection and self-protection. I begin to strip myself of this putrid garment, as I see that it has made me a magnet for dark, demonic entities. They are attracted to this putrid robe. Demonic flies are drawn to me. Lord, thank you for this vision. Seer it into my mind so I never go back to being okay with things that are detestable to you and your spirit.”
In this vision, I could see my cloak was attracting dark things and repelling God’s light. The Lord has put this verse so heavy on my heart for this season.
“Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15
The Lord has been putting it on my heart, when I read a verse, to look into the whole chapter around it so I can gather the context in which it was written.
AFTER I journal these things out with God, I go back to Psalms 51 and read the WHOLE chapter and this is what it says:
“God, give me mercy from your fountain of forgiveness! I know your abundant love is enough to wash away my guilt.
Because your compassion is so great, take away this shameful guilt of sin.
Forgive the full extent of my rebellious ways, and erase this deep stain on my conscience.
For I’m so ashamed. I feel such pain and anguish within me.
I can’t get away from the sting of my sin against you, Lord! Everything I did, I did right in front of you, for you saw it all.
Against you, and you above all, have I sinned. Everything you say to me is infallibly true and your judgment conquers me.
Lord, I have been a sinner from birth, from the moment my mother conceived me.
I know that you delight to set your truth deep in my spirit. So come into the hidden places of my heart and teach me wisdom.
Purify my conscience! Make this leper clean again! Wash me in your love until I am pure in heart.
Satisfy me in your sweetness, and my song of joy will return. The places you have crushed within me will rejoice in your healing touch.
Hide my sins from your face; erase all my guilt by your saving grace.
Keep creating in me a clean heart. Fill me with pure thoughts and holy desires, ready to please you.
May you never reject me! May you never take from me your sacred Spirit!”
Psalms 51:1-11
I want you to PAY attention, that my prayer was for Wisdom and for God to show me something I could not see from my own perspective…and BEFORE I had a chance to read the whole Psalm 51, God gave me a VISION of putrid clothes that were stained with decay and defilement. It was a CLEAR picture with memories of the scent of decay. God really drilled it in my mind that THIS is what the spirit realm sees when I am wearing the fruit of Bitterness and Resentment. It’s ugliness conceals my true Identity as I am a child of God fashioned in His image but it is up to me to keep my robes of righteousness clean and attract beauty and good into my life.
How do I do this? By bringing my sinful heart, motives and attitudes and repenting before the Lord, asking Him to forgive me and wash me clean. This is the power of the blood of Jesus. We are not righteous but because we turn to Him as our Salvation, His blood of sacrifice ALONG with our genuine, heart-felt repentance, has the power to clean us. Jesus’ sacrifice will remain null and void if we do not do our part and repent and turn from our wickedness. This means turning from it over and over again. Not expecting perfection, just continuing to turn to Jesus in a genuine way.
Jesus’ sacrifice will remain null and void if we do not do our part and repent and turn from our wickedness. This means turning from it over and over again. Not expecting perfection, just continuing to turn to Jesus in a genuine way.
I want to note that when I hear from God, I am in a position of action; I am actively waiting to hear Him and ready with a pen to capture what He says in words spoken to my spirit or in pictures captured by my spirit. When I become apathetic and do not treat them as the precious gift they are, I notice they do not come as strong or as often. I also notice the more I share what God is showing me, the more He shows me. I believe this spoken about in His word:
“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.” I Peter 4:10
Let’s pray to be empowered by righteousness and repelled by sin:
“Heavenly Father,
You’ve given me this one life. I can either live for myself, others, the enemy or you.
Today, I dedicate my heart to you.
Clean out every vile motive, mind-set, set-back and obstacle preventing me from living a life of love, forgiveness, kindness and holiness.
Give me a repulsion for anything that disgusts you.
Help me feed my spirit and starve the flesh.
My righteousness is as filthy rags, so thank you for the visual of my unrighteousness.
Bless me to be a fountain of blessing that pours out on others.
As I walk out your will and ways, strengthen my resolve and extend my days.
In Jesus’ name, and for His kingdom, have your way with me. Amen.”
