First, it started with prayer. When I asked Jesus into my heart, He spoke to my spirit, “Your life will be a life of prayer.” That’s all I knew. I didn’t know what I was good at. I didn’t know what God called me to do. I didn’t have any labels for myself, but I definitely heard my life would be a life of prayer. For I was grateful God was merciful to answer the prayers for my life to be spared.
When I heard that mandate from the Lord, I just sat with it. I didn’t really know what to do other than when I saw someone with a need, I would bring it to the Lord and pray. I went through a lengthy season of inner healing and deliverance, learning my identity in Christ.
Usure of what a life of prayer would look like, God called John and I to San Diego. Soon after our move, the Lord brought the most incredible mentor into my life. Lauren Hasson was the first woman who spoke Identity and Destiny into me. She never tried to change who I was, but her influence uncovered the false labels and roles I had accepted. She empowered me to see myself with a new lens.
During this time, she shared an incredible story of her Aunt Ruth, and how Aunt Ruth prayed everyone in her family into salvation. Ruth was a powerful force, but if you were to look at her from the outside, she was frail, little, and single.
Both Ruth and her husband were dutifully serving the Lord together. When they lost their four-year-old son due to an illness, the husband walked away from God and wanted Ruth to join him. Ruth endured a painful separation, but she remained faithful to her Lord. Her marriage dissolved and she chose to remain single. From the outside, it didn’t look like much was happening, but, on the inside Ruth remained a determined powerhouse. She prayed the Hamilton family into the kingdom, and to this day each member of this incredible legacy serves the Lord to some capacity. It’s tough to image where the Hamilton family would be without Aunt Ruth.
Ruth used her time to sow into her calling and fully leaned into it, never looking back. Hearing Aunt Ruth’s story inspired me to fully lean into the mandate for prayer on my life. I have a passion prayer because it’s connecting with my Father. I enjoy His presence. He listens, cares and truly leads if I invite Him to. What an incredible treasure the Lord wants to commune with us!
About, a year and a half ago, I felt the Lord leading me to go on a fast. I just kept putting it off. I’m not the kind of person who likes to fast. I mean, who really does like to fast? Seriously, the first thing I want to do when I get up in the morning, is eat. I’m hungry!
When I turned 50, it seemed overnight I got a birthday gift…I gained some weight. God doesn’t usually comment on my appearance, but when I noticed these changes, I heard this in my spirit, “You’re getting really fleshy. In the spirit and in the flesh.”
I was like, “God! That’s not very nice!” Quickly I was reminded there’s diabetes in my family bloodline and my prayer for a healthy life. God also brought to my remembrance the mandate of my life was prayer, which by default includes fasting.
He spoke to my spirit: “You’re praying for a lot of breakthroughs. But where’s your skin in the game?”
I really began to think about that as I’ve been praying for more spiritual development, to grow in my gifts and understand my calling. The mark of a prayer person is being submitted to God and when He calls for a fast to simply obey.
I said, “Lord, you’re going to have to change my heart and empower me. I do absolutely don’t want to!”
For the record, most things God has called me to do is way outside of my comfort zone and I am quick to let Him know how I feel, but when He speaks, I get no rest until I obey. Not too long after that, I woke up and heard, “Fast breakfast.” I ignored my growling stomach and obeyed. The next day as I was thanking Him for getting me through the fast, I felt Him prompt me to fast breakfast and lunch. I obeyed.
The next day, I felt Him nudge my spirit, “Let’s do it again.”
He continued to do this and a week turned into…twelve weeks!
During this time, I kept asking the Lord, “Are we done yet?” While on this fast, my one prayer was David’s lament, “Create within me a clean heart and renew a right spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10
The Lord was pulling up deeply rooted issues I thought were part of my ‘quirky’ personality. Painfully traumatic roots were connected to a false identity and during this fast, I broke covenant with key things that kept me frozen in a loop for years.
This fast was vital for me being where I am today, especially when it comes to my authority and identity.
Fast forward to today. The Lord has shown me fasting isn’t just for me. Fasting is a gift we can give someone else. It’s a silent gift (which in the kingdom of God is the most powerful and blessed kind of present!)
“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” John 15:13
The Lord doesn’t just bless the person we’re fasting for. He blesses the vessel that does the fasting!
“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Matthew 6:33
The Lord also impressed upon me that Fasting is a discipline and a gift we can only give the Lord now. It’s an eternal gift connected to eternal blessings. I don’t know about any of you, but one of my highest motivations is to present gifts to Jesus. I want him to be happy and have zero regrets He shed His blood for me!
One of my love languages is gifts and the other is acts of service. Both of these take time and trouble and go further than lip service; I like seeing proof of love.
If I want to present the Lord gifts that matter to him, what does the Lord want more than anything? He told me obedience. The gifts we give Him are wrapped in our obedience. So, if he’s calling us to pray for someone, He might be calling us to take it to the next level and fast for them. And as we lay down our life, time, and trouble, for the kingdom of God, He open our lives to a blessing because He cannot help but bless the vessel He flows through. That’s His nature.
So, that’s how a girl who hates missing breakfast has now made fasting a lifestyle. Sometimes God will use our flesh to wake us up in the spirit.
“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” Genesis 50:20
I can see God using the diabetes in my bloodline for the good of my calling and for His glory. Fasting is a discipline which keeps us dependent upon Him…which is exactly where we all need to be!
